


I’ll Love You Even Now

by Sky625



Category: The Owl House (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Bisexual Disaster Luz Noceda, F/F, First Kiss, First Love, Fluff, Gay Disaster Amity Blight, Grief/Mourning, I refuse, Love is in the Air, Romance, Sad and Happy, There will be no slow burn, Wakes & Funerals, fast burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-24
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-15 01:34:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29676363
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sky625/pseuds/Sky625
Summary: How do you let go of someone you’ve lost? The person who lit up your world with stories and magic, who’s very smile sent shivers down your spine?That’s the question Amity has been asking.
Relationships: Amity Blight/Luz Noceda, Eda Clawthorne/Camila Noceda
Comments: 7
Kudos: 36





	1. Chapter 1

You’re still alive in the stars, Luz, but I’m here on the ground, where this morning you’re having an open-casket funeral. I know you’re still out there, giving the world that grin of yours. And I’m upset with you because you said you wouldn’t leave. Yet, here we are. It hurts even more because this isn’t the first promise you’ve broken.

I don’t want you to hate me as I go through the memories we’ve shared together. You know I process things verbally. I just need to explain things to myself, and to you, so that we both understand. And I want you to know that I don’t hate you for leaving for school in California, I know that it was your dream to become an author, you’ve been saying that since I met you. I just didn’t think that you leaving meant you were leaving for good.

I remember how hard it was to break up with you so you could go off to Los Angelas to make your mark on the world. I remember how it felt when my parents forbade me from seeing you, and how you snuck through my bedroom window to see me when everyone was asleep. I remember it like it was yesterday, the way your hand felt in mine as we walked the streets together, visiting all the little shops that Main Street had to offer. I even remember your near death experience when a car almost hit you.

I hated you for your carefree attitude, of how you weren’t bothered by almost getting run over. But I loved you for it just as much. When I pulled you out of traffic I made you promise not to wind up dead in some freak accident. 

“I promise I won’t die anytime soon,” you said easily as you hugged me tightly.

But that was a promise you weren’t able to keep. You said you’d always come back home safely. Of all the things to do, of all the promises to break, why did it have to be that one? 

I can’t believe you’re really gone.

It felt like no time at all had passed when Willow and I were helping you box up all of your possessions to ship off to L.A. You were tripping over yourself when you tried to carry more boxes than you could handle. Your Azura blanket nearly smothering you when you fell backward, the box you were holding pinning you to the ground. 

But that was ancient history. You left the future to me. A path I will have to tread alone.

If I’m going to have any hope of making it through this funeral tomorrow, I need to take a trip down memory lane. Back when we were two people falling in love over fantasy books and hot chocolate, hiding in a blanket fort in your room, pretending to be witches practicing spells.

I got lost in the worlds you would create so effortlessly. You never had to try to imagine a world so different from our own. The magic we practiced in our castle felt real. You made it so. You lit up my world with your words and the kindness you would show in everything you did.

I have nothing but memories now, and I have you to thank for that.


	2. Chapter 2

It all began with a tumble.

When I close my eyes I can see it. The smile you had on your face, the sparkle in your eyes, and the energy you had in your voice. You talked about fantasy like it was your whole world. You put life into it unlike anything I’ve ever seen. I guess that’s why I fell in love with it too.

I don’t need to explain this, Luz, of how we met, you were there and would know. It just helps. Remembering things how they were, the simple perfectness of that moment.

You were walking the halls with your nose in a book, letting muscle memory and faith be your guid as you walked from class to class. You always got so engrossed in your stories, whether they were someone else’s or your own. Getting so sucked in, tying a rope around your waist became the only way to keep you safe. From losing yourself to the written word.

This is how we met.

It was passing period between third and fourth periods. I was walking from English to History, my head was swimming with grammar rules and exceptions that walking straight a near impossibility. As I stumbled through the halls, the sounds of lockers slamming all around me, I bump into something.

That something was you, Luz.

I fell to the ground, making an an audible thump as as I landed on my side, the book I had been carrying was lying open at my feet. My head was spinning from the fall, making the shoes standing before me look hazy and unfocussed.

“I’m so sorry. Are you okay?” Came the voice of a girl Amity scarcely recognized. Looking up, I saw a girl, her dark eyes looking down at me. It took a moment for me to notice the girl holding out a hand. Taking a moment to collect myself, I took the girl’s hand, and was pulled to my feet.

“I’m fine,” I muttered. Contrary to popular opinion, I did not like being nocked to ground. My side was throbbing from the impact, and I was certain I would have a bruise soon.

“You took quite a spill there,” the girl smiled at her. “Hope I didn’t accidentally break you.” 

The pain in my side was lessening slightly, giving me some time to compose myself. The pain wasn’t terrible, but I would have been lying if I said I was totally comfortable. The book I had previously been carrying was lying at my feet. I bent to pick it up, stalling for a moment to think of a response. I wasn’t very good at talking to people my own age before.

Straightening and with book in hand, I looked over the girl for the first time since literally bumping into one another.

What I saw was breathtaking. 

It was like a vacuum had been switched on, only instead of pulling up dust and dirt, it instead sucked in the world. The sounds of the passing students, their idle chatter, and the sounds of lockers faded away, leaving the two there, suspended by a moment of perfection. 

Before me stood a girl of about fourteen, around my own age. The girl wore black leggings, a pullover that was white along the midsection down and purple along the chest and neck, a purple hood hung lazily behind her. She wore plain white Vans.

Her outfit was cute, but that’s not what captured my attention. It was her face. It wasn’t the roundness and softness of it that drew her in, nor the way her pixy hair framed her face, making her look even more youthful than she already was.

It was her eyes and smile that took my breath away. 

Her eyes were dark brown like everything else about her, but they radiated hope, wonder, joy that no sadness could sweep away. Eyes that could look at something as mundane as a lamp post and see the simple beauty in it that many can’t. Her smile conveyed the same message. How could something as simple as a smile fill you up with warmth and life? Something as easy as that couldn’t possibly come from such a gesture. But you had managed it. You always did.

It was mesmerizing.

It took me a moment to realize that someone was asking her a question. In my daze, completely entranced by the girl in front of me, had missed Luz repeatedly calling out, trying to get my attention. I shook myself out of my stupor, and the world around her snapped back to reality. Everything filled with noise and activity once more. The connection the two had shared, while lasting moments to any passerby, felt like a lifetime. An instant that lasted an eternity.

“Hey, are you all right?” The girl’s voice was filled with concern. “You sort of spaced out for a minute there.”

“I-I’m fine,” I managed, cursing myself for my clumsiness. Though, in my defense, how would you react if a pretty girl slammed into you and knocked you to the floor?

“Good. Otherwise, I would have had to carry you to the nurse like Azura did for Hecate did in book 3. I don’t think my nerd weak arms could handle that.” The girl cocked her head and gave her sun of a smile.

I remember that moment like it was yesterday, the day two paths collided by some stroke of luck. You were in my life now, and we have been friends ever since.

~ 

The world was moving by in a blur, but I was motionless.

The bus rolled through the streets of downtown Tulsa, the bus driving smoothly down the freshly paved highway. The roads needing their bi-monthly construction checkup were being tended to by the dozens of workers that dotted the blocked lanes and intersections. Some lanes of cars raced past uninterrupted, while others were at a complete standstill, only moving a few feet ever several minutes. 

Our bus was one of the lucky few, our lane mostly clear with little traffic getting in the way. It was a good thing, too, since an important event was taking place today, an event that Luz refused to miss.

Their was a scheduled book fair that was scheduled for that day, and Luz, being the bookworm that she was, had begged and pleaded for them to go to the book fair together. Not that I needed much convincing. Anything to see that bubble of excitement, that spark of joy that caused my heart to thrum loudly in my chest. 

I sat there in an uncomfortable bus seat in contented silence, watching absentmindedly as the buildings wizzed by, the undulating shades of gray that surrounded them, like a concrete hedge maze. Luz sat next to me, talking animatedly about the upcoming event. 

“We’re going to have so much fun. I just know it! There’s going to be so much to do and see. Oh! I wonder if we’ll find any new books to buy? I hope so!”

I stole a glance at Luz, her hands were moving about wildly, her fingers in constant motion, running through her hair, tapping on her jeans. Her hand walking along her leg like a five-legged tarantula. A sure-fire sign that she was excited. If her endless amount of energy and vibrating body wasn’t enough of a clue, this was. You could tell always tell how Luz was feeling when you looked at her hands.

Even though they’ve been friends for ages, I still couldn’t understand why and how Luz was as happy as she was. Everything excited the girl: movies, books, especially The Good Witch Azura series, and other forms of art. Cooking was a new favorite of hers, she constantly had me taste testing her newest concoctions. Not all of them being successes.

Luz was always doing something, whether it be writing a new story, or deciding on a whim to learn to sew. One time, she even tried to train for a triathlon last year. That lasted a few weeks before Luz had come to the conclusion that anyone who did something like that for fun had something seriously wrong with their heads.

All of these quirks, these oddities, this mish-mash of seemingly random hobbies and interests were what made Luz, well, Luz. It was who she was and no one, not even my parents could stop her. 

And they tried.

It was this never ending optimism and creativity that drove me to them. Luz had an energy about them that grabbed people and pulled them in. It didn’t seem to matter who the person was, if Luz wanted to meet someone, Titan help anyone who tried to stop her.

“A stranger is just a friend you haven’t met yet,” she had said one morning on our way to school. Luz, seeing an opportunity to be social, decided to help the trash man with one of their stops. By the end of it, the two were in deep conversation, talking like old friends even though they’d only met only a few minutes ago.

This person was something special. I can feel it in my bones. 

“What do you think, Amity?”

I blinked in confusion at the mention of my name. “Huh?” Did I zone out again? I gave myself an internal mental shake. “I’m sorry?”

Luz gave me those eyes she does when she’s found an interesting puzzle. She doesn’t pry, but she does repeat her question.

“Well,” I started, considering the question, biting the inside of my cheek. “I’m not sure what to expect. I’ve only ever heard of events like these. My parents didn’t think to highly of such things.”

Luz’s hummed, her face, a kaleidoscope of emotions flashing over her features.   
There was the normal sun, a solar eclipse, and then the traces of a sunrise. Her face turned thoughtful.

“I know what we should do.”

“You do?” 

“Yes. A perfect screw you to your parents.”

“How?”

“Let’s buy something.” 

“What?”

“Yeah. I buy you something and you but me something. You can then parade all around your house with it. Really stick it to your parents that you had a great time at some fair.”

I thought about that for a moment. The idea of possibly wasting money on something cheap and not meaningful didn’t sit well, feeling like a cannon ball had landed in my stomach. But the idea of intentionally annoying her parents, doing something they would certainly disapprove of, did send a smile from my heart to my lips. A mischievous smile that would even the Greek god Hermes proud.

“Deal.”

The girls shook hands. The game was on.

~ 

When the girls stepped off the bus at the book fair’s entrance, one thing became immediately apparent. It was scorching out. The sun was shining high above them, firing the world and its people like a kid with an hourglass on a colony of ants. It felt like jumping into boiling soup, the air was thick and heavy. 

“You know, I’ve been living here for most of my life and I still can’t get used to this heat,” Luz said, already winded.

I could only nod my head in agreement. “Let’s get something to drink before we die. We can’t enjoy the fair if we are sun dried husks.”

The two went off on a perilous adventure to find something cold and refreshing to drink. They found a stand which sold them a large drink of their choice. Luz walked away with a lemonade and I, being the more sensible, got a large ice water. The heat was not going to ruin today. I was determined to see it through.

Walking around the fair was an experience and a half. There were dozens and dozens of stalls and booths dedicated to buying books used and new, of all shapes and sizes, and in every genre under the sun. Romance, horror, graphic novel, self-help, mental health. If you could think it, this fair had it. 

“I didn’t realize Oklahomans were such readers.”

I couldn’t hold back a snort of amusement at that jab. Southerners were known for not being the sharpest knife in the crayon drawer. I had run into my fair share of bizarre Oklahoman interactions. I suppose, anything was possible.

The stand lined street was crawling with people, many of whom were older adults who were huddled in the true crime and non-fiction sections. There were younger kids, too, flocked over to the sci-if sections and graphic novels. Books weren’t the only things on display. Memorabilia of popular series dominated a large space of several stalls. Life sized cardboard cutouts of Han Solo holding a blaster, costumes of popular characters and props hung from shelves. I could have sworn that there were even replicas of Eragon’s sword, Brisignr, glittering prettily inside a glass case. 

This place looked more like a convention for all things literary than a real book fair. At least, that’s what I suspected. Luz would know more about this than I do.

I glanced over at Luz, her eyes were sparkling with awe and wonder, her mouth was slightly open, making her look like a fish out of water as she scanned the scene before her.

We don’t stay as long as either of us would have liked, wandering around aimlessly to the stalls that piqued our interest. Luz naturally gravitating towards the more fantasy oriented sections, while I tended to stray closer to the young adult sections. Luz was more interested in magic and other fantasy jargon that was a bit difficult to understand half the time. Luz would talk endlessly about the advantages of certain magic systems over others, which plot points were overly used, providing her own alternative solutions to fix the repetitiveness. It usually involves some clever trick or solution that was so crazy that it couldn’t help but work. It was genius in an unhinged sort of way. Luz always had to put her crazy spin on things.

It was finally becoming to hot to enjoy the outing of theirs, the sun beat down its harmful rays, both of us were dripping with sweat. Despite the heat, Luz someone was still smiling, though her shoulders were sagging. As they walked, I kept glancing at anything that could serve as the perfect gift for Luz. She was a fan of all things fantasy, but nothing I’ve seen so far has really jumped out as the thing to get her. In the end, it wouldn’t matter what I ended up getting her, Luz would appreciate anything she was given, even if she had no use for it. God, she was such a nice person. How did she do that so effortlessly?

“Hey, let”s take a break,” Luz said, steering them over to some nearby shade. The shade was a welcome relief from the blistering weather that was bound and determined to roast them alive. 

They stood for a mi Ute in silence, enjoying the refreshing feeling of the darkness enveloping them. It felt like an summer night, their own pocket dimension of comfort. I drew a sigh of relief.

“Don’t go getting too comfortable on me, Ams, You still need to find me the perfect present.”

I hadn’t forgotten, how could I forget? It was nice to hear that Luz was thinking about their little challenge to one another. I had know idea what surprise Luz had in store for me. Knowing Luz, it could be anything. Had she been looking secretly like I had? Is she as stressed about shopping for me as I am to her? These questions couldn’t be asked, though. It might reveal too much that I wasn’t ready to. Yet. There would be a day for that. Maybe today? 

“I haven’t forgotten our little battle of the Best Friend Gift off,” I say with easy confidence. Trying desperately not to sound excited. 

“Let’s do it, then.” Luz says. 

“Right now?”

“Yeah. Meet back here in 20?”

“Your on.”

Luz turned tail, almost nocking a man over as she scurried away, calling a quick apology as she went. The man waved his walking stick angrily after her, expressing his displeasure on almost being trampled. I could have sworn the man was cursing under his breath as he limped away.

I checked my phone. 19 minutes to go. Hopefully that’ll be enough time. Got to get moving.

Searching for the perfect gift for Luz was turning out to be harder than I first thought. Rationally I know that she’ll appreciate anything I give her. The girl was snarky, but she had manners, she would make a dumb joke about me being a terrible gift giver, but the words would be empty of any malice. But that didn’t make this challenge any easier.

The fantasy section was the obvious go-to, but nothing there was jumping out as the “perfect thing” to get her. There were swords engraved with runes that swirled and spiraled, cloaks of every color under the son. That wouldn’t work, Luz already had three cloaks hanging in her closet. There were figurines of Harry Potter which were neat but they were grossly overpriced and too small to feel meaningful, not exactly gift giving material.

13 minutes to go - an unlucky number. This wasn’t looking great.

There were hundreds and hundreds of options to choose from. Stickers and fake tattoos with quotes from famous series, costume pieces from film adaptations, even custom glass plates with the faces of the Cullen family. Why anyone wanted to eat food off of an unblinking face of Carlisle was beyond me. There were collectables from just about any book you could imagine. Gah, why was this so hard?

And then it hit me.

It was a book, but not just any book. The book was a smoky gray along its body, the spine was a deep purple. The cover was in red, spidery writing, and specs of gold and white dotted the entire book. It looked like a book straight out of a sorcerers library, not on some shelf surrounded by books on recipes from your favorite dwarven taverns. 

The cover read: User’s Guide to Understanding the Complexities and Intricacies of Magic Systems: from Ancient to Modern. This book just screamed Luz. She loved all things magic, the use of wands and wand-less magic, to incantations and spell circles. She knew most magic systems like the back of her hand. A book like this couldn’t be passed up. I needed to get this for Luz. She would have a field day going through the author’s analysis, coming up with her own argument to counter their logic. The stars would come out in Luz’s eyes. Just that thought alone was enough to convince me to buy the book. I didn’t even blink as the seller told me the total. Luz’s joy was worth the price.

I found Luz standing where they said they’d meet with 3 minutes to spare. A great sign. 3 was a strong number.

Luz perked up when she spotted me. “Hey! There you are slow poke. I thought you’d forgotten about me.”

Never. I wanted to say. But I couldn’t. It wouldn’t feel right, even though everything in my body screams. I go for the best approach. 

“Yeah, right. Are you going soft on me, Noceda?”

Luz laughs lightly, sending a shiver down my spine. “In your dreams.”

“Presents?” Luz asks, gesturing to the wrapped package in my hands. The wrapped book feels heavy in my hands. 

“First let’s get out of this heat. I’m turning into a puddle as we speak.”

The next bus arrived 10 minutes later and was heading in the direction of home. It was lucky that we caught this bus, the next one wouldn’t come for another half hour. By that point, I’d be convinced that I was dying of thirst. 

The inside of the bus was mostly empty except for a few passengers. The air conditioning instantly clearing up the fatigue the weather had been causing. Unfortunately, for me, the fatigue was masking my nerves. With the tiredness lifted, I was left with spiders in my stomach. I hope this goes well. I really don’t want to get sick in front of you. 

“Okay. Now presents?”

“You first. You did finish before I did.”

“Okay then.” I hand over the gifted, a breath was caught in my throat as I watched you tear open the paper. My heart beat in time with the seconds as you opened it. 

I’ve seen you smile before. It was a rare occurrence to see you without your trademark grin. This smile blew all other smiles out the water. A babies first smile didn’t hold a candle to the smile you gave me. 

“I love it.” 

Your eyes were shining, like supernovas, and it took everything in my power to not fly away. I gripped the seat hard to ground myself. The adrenaline coursing through my veins made everything feel floaty and out of focus. 

“Y-You do?” I stammered out, not even caring about being a stuttering mess.

“I really, really do. A pretty girl has given me a wonderful and thoughtful gift that will cherish for all time.” You beamed at me and smirked. “I’m now one step closer to taking over the world.”

My brow raised at that. “Really now?”

“Oh, yes!” You said easily. “Magic exists, Ams. And this,” she held up the book, “is my ticket to find it. I will comb through this book cover to cover in search of the magical secrets awaiting inside. I will create a better world and bring magic back to society. For the betterment of humankind, I hereby pledge my life to the study of witchcraft!” You held the book high in the air, a determined look on your face. 

You turned back to me. “Its your turn.”

Your gift was wrapped similarly to mine, simple brown parcel wrapped in twine. I had zero guesses as to what was inside. I tore open the wrapping and found a small booklet. The booklet was filled to the brim with sheep music, original music for. I paused, my mouth hung open.

“This can’t be.”

The music was from The Good Witch Azura movie collection, the original music for the soundtrack was breathtaking. Filled to the brim with flutes and string instruments from all over the world. Listening to the music was like taking an expenses paid trip to another country. But that wasn’t the only surprise. Underneath the first set of music was another booklet, this one was the music for Avatar: the Last Airbender. The first song in the book was Leaves From the Vine, one of my all time favorite pieces of music from the show. My heart rate, which was pounding violently in my chest, began to relax at the memory of the sweet melody. 

“This is incredible!” I exclaimed. “How did you find this?”

You only shrugged. “A witch never reveals their secrets.”

“Is that all I’m going to get out of you?”

“Uh huh.”

“You are insufferable.” My voice was exacerbated but my heart was fluttering. How could this sweet girl be this charming and not even falter? Why was she so thoughtful and full of life? Why did she even bother with someone like her? I was a Blight, my parents had power in political circles, and the money to put most to shame. Amity was responsible with upholding the family title, of bringing the family success by being the best in everything Idid. But Luz never cared about that. She didn’t care that I was a Blight, I didn’t care that I had money, or a reputation to maintain. This girl just saw me for me, nothing more, and nothing less.

I didn’t think it was possible to fall for this quirky girl anymore than I already had. There was no end to it, Luz just had this affect on people. She saw the best in everyone, flaws and all, she accepted you with open arms. My heart was swelling so much that I felt like I might burst.

“I have a question?” I blurted out.

“I have an answer. Let’s see if they match.”

I can’t back down now. I need to say something, otherwise I will explode. My heart was pounding, sounding out of step than it should be. Here goes.

“Okay. This isn’t so much a question as it is a statement. I don’t know why I asked it like that. I feel silly now. Oh, I’m already rambling. Before this gets outs of hand I just need to say that I-I like you and am having a wonderful time with you.” 

I finally forced myself to stop. If I didn’t, I don’t think I’d be able to stop going down an anxiety spiral. My heart was pounding in my ears, the room felt spinn-y, and the world felt tilted on its axis a little more than it normally was. 

Luz sat there patiently as I quieted down. She cocked her head to the side. “Can I say something now?”

I nodded, not daring to speak.

“We’ve been friends for a very long time. I’ve known you since 7th grade. I couldn’t imagine my life without some part of you making an appearance in my life. Believe me, I’ve tried. Every night I lay in bed thinking about what it might be like to go on an adventure of my dreams. To complete sone grand quest that fulfills a prophecy that will unite the world. Every time I replay that fantasy, I’m never alone. Even if I started the journey alone, I never finish it that way. It always ends with a mint haired girl standing next to me, joining me as we finish the quest together.”

I couldn’t stop the sound that came out of my throat, that was halfway between a shriek and a squeal. “I knew it!”

Now it was Luz’s turn to react, and she did not disappoint. She crossed her arms, eyebrows raised, and her head cocked to the right side, it was always the right. A smirk grazed her lips. “Was I that obvious?”

“If that little monologue was any indication, I’d say you’ve fallen pretty far for little ‘ol me.”

“And?”

“You bitch!” I shouted, not meaning to be as loud as I was because people’s heads began to turn in their direction. “You totally stole my thunder. I’ve been a flustered mess around you for forever, trying to muster up the courage to say anything, and you walk up, and just derail my whole plans.”

Luz’s smirk turned into a smile. “And I’d say bu that outburst that you’ve fallen pretty far for little ‘ol me.”

“That’s not the point,” I grumbled, crossing my arms.

I wasn’t really mad, far from it, actually. I was over the moon. The world was alive with music. The world has always sounded a little out of tune, off tempo, but Luz knowing that I like her, and that she likes me back, the world underwent a change. The world’s orchestra had finally gotten in line, playing together rather than separately, the melody finally shining through. 

It was beautiful. The world was beautiful. The girl in front of me was beautiful. A girl who’s face lit up like galaxies, dancing to music only she could hear. 

And I’m excited to see what happens next.


End file.
